Archive | February, 2012

Put it in your mouth (with some manners)

17 Feb

We all do it, we enjoy it by moaning in appreciation, and the whole experience can be quite orgasmic.

EATING – Or the act of stuffing your face with food.

(even Leann Rimes does it)

As a top notch people watcher, I sometimes go deep in thought as I watch someone eat.

It’s funny, you open your mouth, put a fork/knife/burger/chopstick in and BAM it disappears.

Then you go on chewing, either delicately moving your jaws in circular motion, or clapping your jaws and showing the world how the food is decomposing in your mouth (I personally prefer the former) and then GULP, you swallow…

Eating says a lot about us. Through body language, through what we choose to eat – because you are what you eat, remember?

So I’ve noticed a lot of people attack their food. It’s not very chic (to say the least). They curl over their food (an indication of protection/guarding territory) with their arm covering the meal; Their head is tilted downwards and the fork is going into their mouth at a fast pace – repeatedly, even after they are full. This is what I call an aggressive eater.

DUDE, I won’t eat your chicken, you can calm down now.

It is both trivial and touching at the same time.

The act of eating is primitive: Whatever the meal is, whoever the Chef who made it is (or how many Michelin stars they have), the end is still the same. You are still stuffing your face to satisfy a basic need, like everybody else.

Since I was a little boy, the thought haunted me. I feel so much compassion towards an eater; he is reduced, from bully at school, Boss, Politician, murderer, Justin Bieber to a person with the most basic need.

The Bieber needs to eat too

Moral of the story : Do not eat.

I’m kidding.

On a more serious note, I came across a group of people who actually don’t eat: Sun-Eaters.

Sun-eaters look at food as being a secondary source of energy, the Sun being the primary one. Kids don’t try this at home, this is an advanced meditation technique that requires years of spiritual practice. Read more about those who devour sun rays for lunch here:

After reading this, you will never look at eating the same way. (Yes, I am brainwashing you) You will eat more consciously, you will enjoy your food and be aware of what you put it your mouth. I am talking about conscious eating.Read more about it here:

I’m gonna go grab something to eat now y’all.



A stroll along the Corniche

11 Feb

Last weekend was beautifully sunny in Beirut-Finally!

A sun bathed winter day means waking up early and going for a long walk/jog/push-up/stretching marathon with my friend O.

We ditched the party the night before, to be fresh/awake and wore our Sports outfits à la sporty Spice.

10:30 am-As the ritual says, we start off from Manara, next to Mc Donald’s and walk fast towards the American University of Beirut. I will skip the “you will see people from all walks of lifes talk” because we already know that. Seriously. If you go to the Manara expecting people not looking at you, not talking randomly to you or not getting touchy with you then you are delusional.

This.will.happen. And for what it is, it’s cool. Everyone seems adapted to the somewhat unusual mix of bedwins, CEOs, celebrities, tourists, young students, fit men and women, burkas, crosses and the whole pesto sauce.

Be sure to lookout for macho men getting their shoes taken care of with that orgasmic “I am so superior” glare in their eyes – it’s funny, considering the shoes they’re actually wearing.

Also if you hear a man talking REAL LOUD in English like they just landed from Brooklyn, it’s just Abou Ali; He’d be more than happy to have a convo with you and talk about American politics while making his fragrant Turkish coffee.

11:00 am O screams at me for stopping to take pictures. “Yalla JOG!” he says. 20 minutes later, we crossed the entire lower bay, and are now by the “Beirut Eye” or the kitsch and not-so-well-maintained Ferris wheel. We go up the hill (I’m already exhausted).

photo courtesy of

11:30 am- We finally get to Raouche, for a thirst/hunger quenching avocado juice from Barbar. (get it without the condensed milk and extra sugar) . It’s surprisingly good, with fresh avocado and real honey, I wasn’t going to be a pain and ask for it to be organic. I WANT MOAH!

We cross the street for yet another breathtaking (and breath enabling) view of the sea. I try to look at the horizon to relax my computer fed-up eyes. (FACT: looking towards the horizon will relax your eyes).

12:00 pm – It is time to hike.

We have a somewhat secret passage we take down the hill in Raouche. It is just after the rock towards the Movenpick Hotel to the right. The hill goes all the way down to the sea, and it gets very picturesque in Spring with all the wild flowers growing. It’s also an entertaining venue because of all the action going on. You see a lot of men walking down the bushier parts, or even cute girls in their hijabs holding hands with their boyfriends who have a little more than love growing inside them.

photo taken by myself - Spring 2011

But hey we are not voyeurs “focus on your breath, tighten your stomach and ass” says O. So I do tighten my stomach and eventually forget to breathe as we hike down the hill. I’m getting hot.

We go all the way down and up again; I’m so tired that I wouldn’t care less about the gangbang happening behind the bushes.

1:00 pm We leave the area to walk ——————————————————————————————————- all the way back ———————————————————————–to our Starting point.

2:00 pm We finish off the work-out with a delicious light meal at Bread Republic Hamra.

4:00 pm It’s not so sunny anymore, I’m freezing, and I have to go home and blog about this.

Tomorrow is sunny in Beirut too, we will be biking this time. Join 😉

Gimme Moah Design!

4 Feb

I just designed this and I love it.

The 25 Types of People on Facebook

4 Feb

So, which one are you?

1-The “artist”

2-The person who only posts close-ups of their face (and who thanks God everyday for the “Crop” feature)

3- The person who’s trying to get over their ex

4- The person who uses a lot of exclamation marks!!

5- The Traveler

6- The person who thinks Facebook is their diary

7- The Slut

8- The person that likes their own profile pictures/posts

9- The person who’s always threatening to delete Facebook

10- The person that doesn’t know the difference between “then” and “than”

11- The person who can’t sleep and wants you to know about it

12- The Drama Queen/King

13- The Philosophizer:

14- The hypocrite:

15- The person that quotes themselves

16- The “model” / Bad Photoshop Job

17- The idiot in denial

18- The person that thinks Facebook is #Twitter

19- The delusional one

20- The Farmer

21- The Person with strong language skills

22- The “activist”

23- The FAG HAG

24- The awkward dad (and girl with daddy issues)

25- The Jesus freak

& feel free to add moah!